my mother: the gift that keeps on giving

my mother is a professional giver. she is extremely generous, sometimes to a fault. here, i mean to document some of the actual gifts she has given me, because of their numerous and curious natures. let me begin by saying that she has given me a number of christmas ornaments throughout the years. when i was a missionary, she gave me a christmas gift of a dozen glass stylized flamingo ornaments. because where would i be in the mission field without that, you know? she also once gave me an enormous octopus wearing a crown with sparkles. if you don't believe me, here is a photo:

and since being married, she has given my husband a christmas gift of a giant owl ornament. (no photo included because i don't want to have to unpack our christmas stuff.) let me tell you how thrilled daryn was. actually, we were quite thrilled, because this is so funny.

that said, we can press on to her latest adventures in gift giving. she has a penchant for mailing me random things. sometimes, it's a box or bag full of newspaper clippings, or just whole newspapers with nothing in particular identified or circled. she will include programs from plays or ballets she recently saw, obituaries of people i don't know (but whom hopefully SHE knows), and old magazines like sierra club or birdwatchers.

and then, sometimes she sends me a $900 suit from neiman marcus.

this has been going on for some time. it seems there is no in-between for my mother. it's either: a box full of old newspapers, OR...SOMETHING FROM NEIMAN MARCUS. she only shops from catalogues, and while nordstrom was her favorite while i was growing up, she has developed a sincere loyalty to neiman marcus, or at least their catalogue.

so far, she has bought me:

a green and white dress (i used this for some engagement photos)

a $900 suit, which i returned as it wasn't my style, and i couldn't handle that much money being spent on ONE outfit. i have no photo of this as i returned it; however, NM does not refund you, they simply give you a gift card. so pretend that here is a photo of daryn and i eating at the NM cafe for over the past two years.

a nice plain white shift

a lovely blue blouse and an ill-fitting purple skirt, which i returned since it was $1,500 and there just too many other things i can think of that would better suit me for that amount of money. here is the blouse though...

a floofy velour tracksuit which at first i thought would never be possible to wear. but then when i tried it on, it kind of looked awesome. you can't really see it in this pic, but it has now become my official sunday uniform.

an entire bedspread/bed set which technically was for daryn's birthday, not for me. again, daryn was thrilled.

a lovely red shift is the latest purchase.

i must here mention that there is nothing i can do to stop these extravagant purchases. i have tried. believe me. it is very easy to see that we could do other things with this amount of money she feels to spend on such items, but she will not have it.

there are some outliers that i should probably mention as well. these are not necessarily from NM, but they are noteworthy. 

first this fuchsia dress. this was from some other catalogue besides NM.

next, a hat, gloves and scarf (no photo.) you know, for the harsh san diego winter.

this black and white little number. very comfy!

next, this expensive collector's egg from a british catalogue. this thing was a couple hundred POUNDS.

a random, tiny bear with a fish in its mouth, again for daryn. this is a result of my mother's additional passion for american indian stores and paraphernalia, along with a deck of playing cards featuring american indian lore, quotes, and photos. (not pictured) i still have not scored a t-shirt of a wolf howling at the moon though.

and finally, we cannot forget the 3-foot tall santa with a staff and velvet cape which arrived a few weeks before christmas a couple of years ago. this guy photo bombed our christmas card photo last year because he is SO festive.

there are probably many more gifts i am forgetting. i have heard a rumor that my step-father will soon be sending a present for our new pet parrot, miller. i truly have NO IDEA what that will entail, but i will let you know.